| Album notes by G. Whillikens
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| Concurrent with his first appearance on CD (distributed by Rykodisc), Frank Zappa began releasing “Old Masters Box” sets on his Barking Pumpkin label, distributed exclusively through Barfko-Swill (also a direct mail emporium). These Box Sets ultimately contained “digitally re-tweezed analog recordings” of his first twenty original vinyl albums gorgeously replete with updated original packaging.
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| “Old Masters, Box 1”, released early in 1985, included his first five albums (“Freak Out!”, “Absolutely Free”, “We’re Only in It for the Money”, “Lumpy Gravy”, and “Cruising with Ruben & The Jets”). And, in addition, packed underneath everything else, was the Extra Added Attraction of a “Mystery Disc” of previously unreleased recordings augmented with the a- and b-side of a long out-of-print Verve single. “Old Masters, Box 2”, which was released at Thanksgiving, 1986, contained “Uncle Meat”, “Hot Rats”, “Burnt Weeny Sandwich”, “Weasels Ripped My Flesh”, “Chunga’s Revenge”, “Fillmore East - June 1971”, and “Just Another Band from L.A.” plus, once again, another “Mystery Disc” full of wondrous audio delites never before heard in the outside world. The final “Old Masters Box” set contained “Waka/Jawaka”, “The Grand Wazoo”, “Over-Nite Sensation”, “Apostrophe (’)”, “Roxy & Elsewhere”, “One Size Fits All”, “Bongo Fury” and “Zoot Allures” and was released at Christmas, 1987. But, alas, no “Mystery Disc”.
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| “The Old Masters, Box 1” contained a comprehensive 13-inch by 13-inch 28-page book full of information, photographs, press clippings, and lyrics, as well as FZ’s notes on all of the “Mystery Disc” material. Neither of the next two boxes, alas yet again, included such notes or other material, except for the information on the album sleeve itself for the second “Mystery Disc”.
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| In subsequent years, Zappa utilized some, but not all, of the audio material from the two “Mystery Discs” on other releases. That out-of-print Verve single “Why don’tcha do me right?” ▲ / “Big leg Emma” ▲, which concluded “Mystery Disc #1”, ended up on the 1988 CD of “Absolutely Free”. The Festival Hall material from “Mystery Disc #2” appears on FZ’s 1993 release of “Ahead of Their Time”. FZ included a few tracks from both “Mystery Discs” on “The Lost Episodes”, released by Rykodisc in 1996.
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| Rykodisc now presents the special CD edition of the “Mystery Discs”. This single CD edition contains all the material found on both “Mystery Discs” with the exception of “Why don’tcha do me right?” / “Big leg Emma”. Hey, in order to fit it all on a single CD, we had to lose something, and figured most of you must already have “Absolutely Free”. If you don’t, you know you should!
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| [Notes by FZ] “Run Home Slow” was a low-budget Western produced by Tim Sullivan, starring Mercedes McCambridge, written by my friend and high-school English teacher, Don Cerveris. I wrote the music for it.
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| The money from this job was used to buy an electric guitar and the Pal Recording Studio in Cucamonga. Pal was re-named “Studio Z”.
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| [Notes by FZ] This music is also part of the “Run Home Slow” score. In this scene, a nymphomaniac cowgirl is getting plooked by a hunchback, next to the rotting carcass of a former donkey. Really.
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| [Notes by FZ] This is a collage of some dialog and music from the party on opening night. The guests included Captain Beefheart, his former girlfriend Laurie, Ray Collins, Motorhead Sherwood, and Bob Narciso. Bob is singing about the Pall Malls. Motorhead is talking about his girlfriend.
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| [Bob Narciso] Oh, I smoked a Pall Mall
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| Yes, I did
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| Oh yeah
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| Sssh
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| [Jim Sherwood] Oh, you can’t fall on the floor, you know? You know, I make like I’m down on the floor, you know (DO-DO-DO-DOH). Hah hah (LOUIE LOUIE). Oh yeah, I was out screwing this broad one time, we was in the car, you know, I had the radio turned down a little bit. Some shitty commercial came on (DOOT DOOT). She started telling about her… her girlfriends, you know, they would go in the bathroom someplace, not at… at school, you know, at a gas station or something like that. And they would compare each others’ box, man, and uh… compare tits and all this shit, and they’d tell how their boyfriends screwed ‘em and all this stuff, you know, how exciting it was. I was screwing this girl and she was telling me all this shit.
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| [Don Van Vliet] Ha ha ha!
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| [?] Well, I’m waiting…
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| [FZ] Get the rubber hose
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| [Bob Narciso] Damn, I give this guy a ride, ha ha! You know, EEEEH, and stopped his car, and… hey hey hey: “Where you goin’, eh? Wanna ride?”
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| [Jim Sherwood] Sort of lost the… the desire to screw her after all that shit
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| [Bob Narciso] Went to the nearest supermarket
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| And all you will mean to me in the future
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| Stole a heck magazine
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| And each time
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| Went home
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| I think of those lovely eyes
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| Ate some jello
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| I think of your smile that is so true
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| And had a mellow mellow mellow muelo
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| And so dear to me
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| Had a swell time
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| And each year that I have known you, my love
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| I knew
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| I’ve needed you more
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| I knew that my granny would be there
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| Each day, each hour, each minute
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| Because I had a crush on her
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| It’s pathetic, my darling
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| Granny knew that I smoke Pall Mall
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| To note…
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| [Notes by FZ] In order to survive while living in “Studio Z”, I worked a weekend gig at The Village Inn (80 miles away in Sun Village). This is the emcee (identity unknown), introducing the band: Johnny Franklin (bass), Toby (drums), “Frankie Zappo” (guitar), and, overlooked in the excitement, Motorhead on tenor sax.
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| [Announcer] Ladies and gentlemen, do you like the band?
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| [Audience] No! Yeah!
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| [Announcer] Uh? I wanna hear more than that! Do you like the band?
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| [Audience] Yeah! We love it. Yeah!
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| [Little Mary] Yes, we like the band, cat, we don’t like you. Now, get off!
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| [Announcer] Well, little Mary, we like you!
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| [Audience] Yay!
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| [Band member] Hey, John, you know what key I’ve been doing that song in?
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| [Announcer] Well, ladies and gentlemen, will you start slowly tonight […] because we only have ‘bout twenty minutes…
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| [Band member] That song you was singin’ before
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| [Announcer] Twenty minutes before closing time. And we appreciate your patronage and we hope you hurry back, because each and every weekend after the […] is over, we are going to have many attractions coming into the Village Inn! So we would like each and every one’s cooperation, and have a good time and enjoy yourselves. Let’s give the band another hand! Toby on drums, Frankie Zappo on guitar, and our own Johnny Franklin on bass!
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| [Notes by FZ] A lady named Corsa sat in with us that night at the Village Inn. This is a blues song that had been a hit a few years before, recorded by Jimmy Hughes.
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| [Cora Stacker] I’ve got to see you
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| Somehow
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| Not tomorrow
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| Right now
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| I know it’s late
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| Oh, I can’t wait
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| Come on and steal away
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| Please steal away
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| Now don’t start thinking
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| Trying to make up your mind
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| Your folks are sleeping
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| Let’s not waste any time
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| I know it’s late
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| Oh, I can’t wait
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| Come on and steal away
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| Please steal away
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| I know it’s wrong
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| Asking this of you
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| There’s no other way
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| I can be with you
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| If only your folks
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| Would approve
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| Things like these
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| We wouldn’t have to do
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| Oh, I won’t tell
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| Anybody else
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| I’ll keep it to myself
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| I know it’s late
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| Oh, I can’t wait
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| Come on and steal away
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| Please steal away
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| I know it’s wrong
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| Asking this of you
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| There’s no other way
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| I can be with you
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| If only your folks
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| Would approve
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| Things like these
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| We wouldn’t have to do
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| Oh, I won’t tell
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| Anybody else
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| I’ll keep it to myself
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| I know it’s late
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| Oh, I can’t wait
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| Come on and steal away
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| Please steal away
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| ‘Cause I need you
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| Yes I do
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| Oh, by my side
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| Yeah yeah
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| ‘Cause I need you
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| [Notes by FZ] Meanwhile, back at “Studio Z”, I had been working on what might have been the world’s first “rock opera”: a stupid piece of trash called “I was a teen-age malt shop”. This was the opening theme: FZ on piano, Motorhead on acoustic guitar, Vic Mortenson on drums.
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| [Notes by FZ] Besides working on the hideous little rock opera, I was trying to raise money for a micro-budget sci-fi film called “Captain Beefheart vs. The Grunt People”. This is a sample of the dialog. Captain Beefheart was a character I invented for the film. His name derives from one of Don Van Vliet’s relatives who looked like Harry Truman. He used to piss with the door open when Don’s girlfriend walked by and make comments about how his whizzer looked just like a beef heart.
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| [Don Van Vliet] Hello there, kids, it’s your old friend Captain Beefheart! You know me, the magic man, invisible, and all that jazz, ha! Flies through time and space, dimension warp, all that rhythm. Well, anyway uh… I’m here tonight to tell you that we have a heck-of-a-little teen-age opera for you.
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| You’re really gonna dig it, mmmh, yeah, it’s really groovy!
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| [Notes by FZ] In our spare time we made what we thought were “rock & roll records”. In this example, Vliet was “singing” in the hallway outside the studio (our vocal booth) while the band played in the other room.
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| The lyrics were derived from a comic pinned to a bulletin board near the door. The musicians include FZ on guitar, Vic Mortenson on drums, and a bass player surf group (identity unknown).
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| [Don Van Vliet] Wheet!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Yaah
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| Band aids!
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| Metal man!
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| Dirty water!
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| Spoilin’ me!
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| Spoilin’!
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| Spoilin’!
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| Turpentine!
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| Styrofoam!
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| […] water […]
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| Crowbar!
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| Chlorine!
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| Death stroke!
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| Mojo!
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| Woo-hoo!
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| Yeah aaah!
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| Watch out!
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| Look out!
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| Water spout!
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| Don’t shout!
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| Chin clout!
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| Look out!
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| Ah-ah! Woo-hoo! Yeah yeah
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| Work out!
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| Work out!
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| Truck-out!
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| Water spout!
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| Water snout!
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| Bubblin’ brook!
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| Water spout!
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| Bubblin’ brook!
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| Work out!
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| I’m the cook!
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| I’m the cook!
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| I’m the cook!
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| Work out!
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| Don’t shout!
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| Water spout!
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| Look out!
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| Water spout!
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| Water spout!
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| ✄ Twist and shout!
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| Twist and shout!
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| Metal men!
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| Metal men!
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| Iron Man!
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| The living gun!
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| Hit the nostrils!
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| Make money!
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| Metal men!
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| Work out!
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| Froze over!
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| Silent mandroid!
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| Don’t!
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| Don’t!
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| Now, woman
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| Metal men
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| Hawkman
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| ‘Lectro-flyer
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| Announcement
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| Has won his wings!
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| Has won his wings!
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| Has won his wings!
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| Has won his wings!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Wheet! Wheet!
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| Band aids, band aids, band aids!
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| [FZ] Let it roll, take another one. Just the track this time.
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| [Notes by FZ] Another weekend gig recording from an orange-pickers’ bar in Montclair. Later that night, a deranged Mexican tried to pull my mustache off. FZ, guitar, Les Papp, drums, Paul Woods, bass.
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| [Notes by FZ] A “Studio Z” late-night jam with FZ on acoustic guitar, Les Papp on drums, and Bobby Saldana on bass.
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| [Notes by FZ] Once upon a time, I was a disc-jockey on a low voltage college radio station. Nobody ever checked to see what was going on there. I was not a student. I got away with it for a week.
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| [FZ] Here’s another thing that you can do on the piano, if you have one around. If you get tired of playing ♫ “Home on the range”, by colors…
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| Uh… You have to learn two different kinds of backgrounds. You can do ‘em both in the key of C and you’ll be alright.
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| The first one is like this…
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| That one’s pretty easy to master, and then there’s another one which isn’t too tricky either…
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| Now, those… backgrounds, those two backgrounds will work for… oh, I think it’s a total of fifteen thousand different rock & roll songs that you can all sing at parties.
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| [Notes by FZ] Another one of our “rock & roll records”. FZ vocals, piano, bass and drums. “Studio Z” had the world’s only staggered-head 5 track recorder (designed by Paul Buff) ▶. While the big guys were wondering whether stereo was going to catch on, we were doing massive overdubs.
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| [FZ] Charva, I loved you, I loved you through and through
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| I loved you since in grammar school when we were sniffing glue
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| I loved you purty baby, darling, I don’t know what in the world to do about it
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| Boppa-bah-boppa-choo-wah
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| Charva, my darling, the only love I had
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| I hope you will forgive me, dear, for punching out your dad
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| I loved you, I loved you, and I don’t know what in the world I’m gonna do about it
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| Ooohh-oh-oooh
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| Lahm-buh-buhm-buhm
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| I remember, remember the junior prom
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| And I remember the time I broke your father’s arm
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| And I remember, remember all the love we shared
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| Every place and everywhere
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| Oh Charva, Charva, I love you more and more
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| I swear it ain’t because your father owns a liquor store
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| Charva, my baby, I love you and I don’t know what to do about it
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| Oh-oh Charva
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| Ooooohh oh-oh Charva
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| Ooooohh, come back my little darling Charva
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| I love you so much, honey
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| Come back to me, Charva
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| Please Charva, please come back to me
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| [Notes by FZ] An example of multiple overdubs and half-speed recording, circa 1962. FZ speeded-up lead and rhythm guitar, Doug Moon, rhythm acoustic guitar.
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| [Notes by FZ] Ray Collins called me one night to replace another guitar player in the band he had been working with (The Soul Giants), since he had gotten in a fight with him. They had a good gig at a club in Pomona called “The Broadside”. After the sax player, Davy Coronado, quit, I took over, changed the band name, and eventually this recording was made. The drop-outs are on the original tape, caused by a wobbly reel.
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| [Notes by FZ] Through a number of perverse twists of fate, we wound up being used as the “party band” for a movie called “Mondo Hollywood”, in a scene where freaks and maniacs cavort, licentiously ▶.
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| The equipment we are playing on was lent to us by Jim Guercio. Thanks again, Jim. In the background, listening to this spewage was Herb Cohen. He decided to manage the early Mothers a short while later.
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| [Notes by FZ] Almost by accident, we got a record deal. We were completely broke, and the finance company was coming after Jimmy Carl Black’s drum set. We used to collect pop bottles to cash them in so we could buy Wonder Bread and baloney for the rehearsals. In spite of this, we got to practice in some of the best rehearsal places in town. Tim Sullivan had a studio on Seward St. (now occupied by Haskell Wexler). Tim still owed me some money for the “Run Home Slow” movie track. Instead of paying me, he let us use his soundstage. The ever-present Akai tape recorder moved in with us.
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| [Ray Collins] Oh, rock, rock!
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| [Roy Estrada?] Ha ha ha ha ha! Rock, rock!
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| [Ray Collins] Hey, you know, you heard that bop-bop-bop bop. You notice there’s ever been that bop bop-bop-bop bop-bop-chu-bop.
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| [Roy Estrada] I thought it was Bill Haley, I thought it was Bill Haley & The Comets
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| [Jimmy Carl Black?] It was, I… I… I couldn’t remember the words
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| [Notes by FZ] A rehearsal tape from the Seward St. stage of an early version of the song as it was prepared for the ‘Freak Out!’ album.
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| When I won your love I was very glad
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| Every happiness in the world belonged to me
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| Then our love was lost and you went away
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| Now I shed my tears in lonely misery
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| I know now that you never ever really loved me
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| It hurts me now to think you never ever really cared
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| I sit and ask myself a thousand times to try and find
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| What really happened to the love that we shared
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| How could I be such a fool?
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| How could I believe all those lies you told me?
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| How could I be taken in by your sweet face?
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| You spoiled our love
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| You ruined my life
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| I’m so tore down
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| I’m a terrible disgrace
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| But there will come a time and you’ll regret the way
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| You treated me as if I was a fool and didn’t know
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| The many times you lied about your love for me
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| Someone else is gonna know that your love is just a show
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| [Notes by FZ] In either late ‘65 or early ‘66, we worked the Fillmore West as an opening act for Lenny Bruce. Ray Collins provides the introductions, mispronouncing Elliot Ingber’s last name. Bill Graham finishes things off.
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| [Ray Collins] Like to introduce the band:
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| The pachuco over there on ‘37 Chevy ▶ is Roy Estrada
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| On blankets, Cherokee Jim Black
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| On rhythm guitar with a white light, blue triangles behind him, Elliot Bro-Ingber
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| I’m Ray Collins
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| And this is Mother Superior Frank Zappa
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| [Bill Graham] One of the big advantages of having these people on the stage is that they’re one of the few groups of this kind that you can listen to, turn on to, and then dance to. This evening we’re gonna listen, if you want to. If during the first set you want to dance, use the corners or use the stage if you like. After Lenny we’re gonna clear away most of these chairs and do what you like. Everybody’s relatives, the Mothers!
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| [Notes by FZ] This early version was recorded at that same show.
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| Plastic people
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| You gotta go
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| Plastic people
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| You gotta go
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| Three nights and days I walk the streets
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| This town is full of plastic creeps
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| Their shoes are brown ▶ to match their suits
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| They got no balls, they got no roots
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| Because they’re…
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| Plastic people
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| You gotta go
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| (Sure gonna miss ya)
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| Plastic people
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| You gotta go
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| [Instrumental]
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| [Notes by FZ] A few years later, we were well on our way to becoming the most despised musical group of all time… partially for making noises like this on stage in an era when everyone else was stuffing flowers in the ends of policemen’s guns, telling themselves how “envolved” they were for doing something that stupid.
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| [Mothers] PEEP!
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| POO-AHH
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| PEEEP!
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| POOH-ARGGGGGH
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| [FZ] Please, won’t somebody go to bed with Jimmy Carl Black? (POOH-ARGGGGGH) A desperate Indian if ever I’ve seen one!
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| [Notes by G. Whillikens] The “Mystery Disc #2” sleeve says these tracks are “from the Festival Hall Show, London, October 28 1968: Written and Directed by FZ”. In the notes for “Ahead of Their Time”, Zappa goes on to say:
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“Throughout the tour, I had been writing chamber music pieces in airports and hotels. Somewhere in the middle of the tour, when asked about an opening act for the London show, I opted to hire 14 members of the BBC Symphony to play these pieces, and build a cheesy little psychodrama around them, featuring the band doing something other than our usual stuff”.
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| (This was a filmed stage play with costumes and everything). The band on this tour: FZ on guitar and vocals, Ian Underwood on alto sax and piano, Bunk Gardner on tenor sax and clarinet, Euclid James Motorhead Sherwood on baritone sax and tambourine, Roy Estrada on bass and vocals, Don Preston on electric piano and odd noises, Arthur Dyer Tripp III on drums and percussion, and Jimmy Carl Black on drums.
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| [?] Donnie!
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| [Bunk Gardner] Hey, put that down!
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| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] What are you doin’, man?
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| [Bunk Gardner] We’re tryin’ to do some serious…
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| [FZ] They’re tellin’ it’s bullshit and stop it
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| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] What the fuck is this?
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| [Ian Underwood] Don, why are you interrupting our beautiful piece?
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| [Don Preston] Silence, you fools
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| [FZ] Ha ha ha! No, Donnie, more conviction!
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| [Don Preston] SILENCE, you fools! Don’t you believe in PROGRESS?
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| [Bunk Gardner] Take that progress and stick it under a rock
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| [Don Preston] We have to… We must overthrow the diatonic system
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| [FZ] Yes
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| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] Bullshit
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| [Don Preston] We’re coming to the beginning of a new era wherein the development of the inner self will be the most important factor
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| [Ian Underwood] Donnie, your music is full of shit, and besides that it ain’t disciplined
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| [Don Preston] Listen…
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| [Bunk Gardner] Give me four-four
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| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] Togetherness
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| [Bunk Gardner] Yeah
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| [Ian Underwood] Some old melodies
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| [Don Preston] Look, playing…
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| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] Put on a tie!
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| [Don Preston] Playing that kind of music and eating meat, will never… you’ll never be able to see my aura then
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| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] I’ve seen your aura a lot, and it really stinks
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| [Bunk Gardner] You’ve been drinking, Don
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| [Ian Underwood] I can hear your aura and it’s bad, man
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| [Ian Underwood] Play any more
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| [Bunk Gardner] Discipline, you need discipline
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| [Don Preston] No
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| [Bunk Gardner] Four-four
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| [Don Preston] It’s got to be new, it’s got to progress, it’s got to evolve. THERE MUST BE GROWTH!
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| [Bunk Gardner] Ah, man. My goodness…
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| [Don Preston] You’ve got to eat macrobiotic food…
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| [FZ] We’re doing a play
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| [Don Preston] And study astrology. Delve into the occult world.
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| [Ian Underwood] Well, you can delve all you want but we’re formin’ a new group, go… go and do you some yoga exercises
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| [Don Preston] Look
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| [Ian Underwood] Take care of business there
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| [Don Preston] Mark my words: if you continue playing this music something strange may happen
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| [Bunk Gardner] Don’t threaten me!
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| [FZ] By the end of the first show
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| [Don Preston] By the end of the first show. No, the second show.
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| [FZ] So, at this point in the development of our plot the three talented members of the Mothers of Invention have quit the group to form their own band with a lot of discipline
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| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] Yeah
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| [FZ] This is what we need, is a nice disciplined combo!
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| [FZ] And so that they would be completely packaged and fit in with the rest of the disciplined combo, the former members of the Mothers of Invention receive their initiation into the robot musical world
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| [Don Preston] This makes me nervous I’m gonna go do some yoga
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| [Ian Underwood] Yeah, you better
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| [FZ] This is Euclid Motorhead Sherwood
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| [Jim Sherwood] What’s the matter with him?
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| [Ian Underwood] He’s nervous ‘cause he couldn’t play with our new group
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| [Jim Sherwood] Oh, that’s nice, look at those suits
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| [FZ] Motorhead covets the uniforms of the other band. And also shows some interest in the bum of Underwood.
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| [Ian Underwood] AYYYY
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| [Jim Sherwood] Hey, ten years ago I knew a lot of guys that had suits like these. They’re really nice. Hey, can I play in band with a suit like that too?
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| [Ian Underwood] No!
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| [Jim Sherwood] But I like the suits and I can play good. I can play… I can play anything.
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| [Mothers] BOO! BOO! BOO!
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| [FZ] Motorhead is lying. He can’t play good, he can’t play anything. He’s trying to con his way into the other band. He knows they don’t want him.
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| [Bunk Gardner] I heard you play before
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| [Jim Sherwood] But I got practicing and play good
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| [Ian Underwood] No discipline
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| [FZ] He’s lying. He hasn’t been practicing, he doesn’t do shit.
|
| [Bunk Gardner] Last week he couldn’t even count to four
|
| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] Come on, beat it, man
|
| [Jim Sherwood] You can’t do that to me, I’ll fix you
|
| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] Go ahead
|
| [Jim Sherwood] I’ll get into your band. I’ll get into your band.
|
| [Bunk Gardner] OK, Motorhead, just get out of the way
|
| [Jim Sherwood] You can’t stop me, I’ll get in there somehow
|
| [Ian Underwood] Take a walk, you fruit
|
| [Jim Sherwood] There’s no way you can stop me, I bet ya!
|
| [FZ] Motorhead explains to the members of the robot combo that nothing can stop him, he will join their group whether they like it or not
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] What’s goin’ on here? I thought we were gonna play a rock & roll concert.
|
| [Ian Underwood] Rock & roll? I… I already quit the Mothers.
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] How are you gonna get laid if you don’t play rock & roll and drink beer? You get laid after the concert if you play rock & roll, this kind of crap you’re not gonna… you’re not gonna get laid anyway with that uniform on. I’ll tell you what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna quit, I’m gonna go out and hustle me some chick, the hell with you.
|
| [Ian Underwood] Jimmy, you need some discipline
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] I’m leaving the group
|
| [Mothers] BOO! BOO!
|
| [FZ] Jimmy Carl, I must inform you… I must inform you, Jimmy Carl, for your own good, that here in London you’re not gonna get any pussy unless you look like a pop-star. Fix him up! Mod jacket…
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Oh Jeezus
|
| [FZ] Frilly mod neckpiece? Jimi Hendrix wig, and a feather boa
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| [Jimmy Carl Black] WAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
|
| [FZ] Jimmy Carl Black enters the audience to hustle some young ladies.
|
| And if you’re really lucky, get something for the robots
|
| Mmmm, their little mechanical things are going up and down, up and down
|
|
|
| [Roy Estrada] Domino, Domino, Domino Biz-bo-OH, Domino Biz-bo-OH, amen, Domino Biz-bo, Hallelujah, eh
|
| [Ian Underwood] Et cum spiritu tuo
|
| [Roy Estrada] Ian, I don’t think I qualify for the Mothers
|
| [FZ] They’re making up their lines as they go along, isn’t it thrilling?
|
| [Roy Estrada] I think I’m holding the group back because I’m a MEXICAN. And also because I don’t play bass good.
|
| [Ian Underwood] I don’t care how you can play bass but we have NO MEXICANS in this group
|
| [Roy Estrada] And I wanna join your group
|
| [Ian Underwood] NO MEXICANS!
|
| [Roy Estrada] I can sing opera, I have already quit, I cut my hair, I got all my shit together here. I can do it.
|
| [Ian Underwood] I don’t care how you look you gotta be able to cut the part
|
| [Roy Estrada] I can sing. Please. Please, Ian, give me a CHANCE.
|
| [Ian Underwood] I don’t believe you can sing
|
| [Roy Estrada] Ah, PLEASE! Ah, Ian, PLEASE, IAN! PLEASE!
|
| [Ian Underwood] OK, Mexican
|
| [Roy Estrada] Please
|
| [Ian Underwood] OK, Mexican
|
| [Roy Estrada] OK
|
| [Ian Underwood] Sing this note…
|
[Jimmy Carl Black & Roy Estrada] You think everything gonna be alright
|
| [Ian Underwood] OK. You passed the first part of your audition. Now you gotta sing…
|
| [Roy Estrada] Mi mi mi mi
|
|
|
| Poo-laa
|
| Poo-la-aa poo-laa
|
| Poo-da poo-laa poo-laa poo-oo-laa
|
| WEE-OOO-WEE-OOO-EEE-EEE-OOO-OOO
|
| Ah-ah-ah ah-aaah-ah-aaah
|
| Aa-aa-ah aa-ah
|
| WEE-OOO-WEE-OOO
|
| Aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aah
|
| [Mothers] BOO! BOO!
|
|
|
| [FZ] The rejected Mexican pope leaves the stage
|
| [Mothers] TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [FZ] Motorhead is attempting to join the band…
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [FZ] Undaunted, the band plays on
|
|
|
| [FZ] Meanwhile, the snack enters the mind of Dom DeWild
|
|
|
| [Mothers] ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, ONE
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [FZ] It’s the macro-biotic food
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [Don Preston] HA HA HA HA HA
|
|
|
| [Mothers] THREE! FOUR! TWO! TWO!
|
|
|
| [FZ] While the well-disciplined ▶ Ian Underwood plays his piano solo, Dom DeWild, transformed, begins to sneak up on him
|
|
|
| [Mothers] BOO! BOO! BOO!
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| Sell us a president, agency man
|
| Smiling Big Brother, stern father perhaps!
|
| Sell us a president, agency man
|
| A gay smiling nothing we know never craps
|
|
|
| We’ll sell him in the movies on the tube throughout the year
|
| We’ll sell him by the buckets to the Okies drinking beer
|
| We’ll teach him how to walk and talk, we’ll putty up his chin
|
| We’ll print his picture everywhere, OF COURSE THE SCHMUCK WILL WIN
|
|
|
| From the heart of old Death Valley
|
| To the ruling of our land
|
| A simple trick, you simple pigs
|
| Just the way we planned
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
| [Notes by G. Whillikens] Recorded at Apostolic Studios in New York City in 1967. Exact personnel unknown but, along with Zappa on guitar, it is possible the other musicians playing in these sessions are Roy Estrada on bass, Don Preston on keyboards, Ian Underwood on keyboards and saxophones, Motorhead Sherwood on saxophones, Bunk Gardner on woodwinds, Jimmy Carl Black on percussion, Art Tripp on percussion, and perhaps, even, Ray Collins on vocals. Ah-rumpa-pumpa.
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [Ray Collins?] Sell us a president, agency man
|
| Smiling Big Brother, stern father perhaps!
|
| Sell us a president, agency man
|
| A gay smiling nothing we know never craps
|
|
|
| [FZ] One, two, three, four
|
|
|
| When he’s closed the schools and burned the books the way we’ve planned
|
| We’ll get the press together AND THE BARRY SADLER BAND!
|
|
|
| Another one
|
|
|
| Rousing, mmh
|
|
|
| When he’s closed the schools and burned the books the way we’ve planned
|
| We’ll get the press together and the Barry Sadler Band!
|
|
|
| With lots to drink from 9 o’clock they’ll all be bombed by 10
|
| We’ll reveal he’s bound for Washington AND SELL HIM ONCE AGAIN!
|
|
|
| [FZ] OK!
|
| [Ray Collins] That ending… That ending comes up like ransa-pransa-prance
|
| [FZ] OK, now the next ransa-pransa
|
|
|
| Go! One, two
|
|
|
| We’ll sell him in the movies on the tube throughout the year
|
| We’ll sell him by the buckets to the Okies drinking beer
|
| We’ll teach him how to walk and talk, we’ll putty up his chin
|
| We’ll print his picture everywhere, of course the schmuck will win
|
|
|
| [FZ] You gotta… You gotta sing: “Of course the schmuck will win” on the end
|
| [Ray Collins] Yeah
|
| [Roy Estrada] Take it, Don
|
| [Ray Collins] That sound kind of funny if we’re rumpa-pumping and then we stop and go uh: “Of course the schmuck will win”
|
| [FZ] Yeah, it’s a little funny
|
|
|
| People are a lot of pigs THEY’RE GREEDY AND THEY’RE DUMB
|
| I’m sure that’s just a simple truth LOOK HOW FAR HE’S COME!
|
|
|
| [Ray Collins?] From the heart of old Death Valley
|
| To the ruling of our land
|
| [FZ] A simple trick, you simple pigs
|
| Just the way we planned
|
|
|
| [FZ] Mothers of Invention have spent many long hours in rehearsal trying to perfect their musical technique which they hope that you will enjoy, but if you don’t enjoy it, go fuck yourself.
|
| AND, as I said, it’s a problem in semantics. You have to understand what I mean when I tell you to go.
|
| [Notes by G. Whillikens] From the “Uncle Meat” sessions, 1967. FZ states in “The Lost Episodes” notes (yes, you can find them there ▲):
|
“I love sea shanties. I thought they were really good melodies, so I arranged them for a rock & roll band. We used to play ‘em all the time. I used to really love to listen to sea shanties and folk music. When everyone else was listening to Cream, I was listening to A.L. Lloyd and Ewan MacColl. These were two old guys who used to record together, trying to replicate the original instrumentation of sea shanties. ‘Handsome cabin boy’ is a song about the bogus certification of sailors. A girl goes on board dressed as a boy, and gets pregnant. The lyrics are all about who done it”.
|
| (If you’re curious, you can hear these lyrics on “Blow boys blow” by Ewan MacColl and A.L. Lloyd, re-released on Tradition in 1996). The musicians are believed to be Frank Zappa on guitar, Art Tripp on marimba and vibes, Roy Estrada on bass, Don Preston on keyboards, and Jimmy Carl Black on drums.
|
| [Notes by G. Whillikens] The “Mystery Disc #2” sleeve says this is from The Ballroom in Hartford, Connecticut. No other information for this track is given. However, this was likely recorded at the same time, February 1969, as The Ballroom tracks which appear on “You Can’t Do That on Stage Anymore Vol. 1”. If so, the musicians are Frank Zappa on guitar, Roy Estrada on vocal and bass, Lowell George on guitar, Don Preston on keyboards, Buzz Gardner on trumpet, Ian Underwood on alto sax, Bunk Gardner on tenor sax, Motorhead Sherwood on baritone sax, Jimmy Carl Black on drums, and Art Tripp on drums. According to the “YCDTOSA Vol. 1” notes, these Ballroom tracks were recorded
|
“on the tour just prior to the band’s break-up (after a concert in North Carolina a few months later).
|
The audience at this show (in a dance hall) also seemed to prefer the dynamic musical stylings of the Vanilla Fudge. (At another concert on Long Island some members of the audience were actually chanting: ‘Youse guys stink… bring on the Fudge’)”.
|
| In the “YCDTOSA Vol. 1” booklet The Ballroom may actually have been moved to Stratford, Connecticut.
|
|
|
| OH GOD, OH GOD, OH GOD, OH GOD, OH GOD, OH OH DEAR
|
|
|
| LITTLE RIGHT THERE, LITTLE RIGHT THERE, OH, A LITTLE RIGHT THERE!
|
| RIGHT THERE, OH-OH!
|
| RIGHT THERE, OH! AH! AH! AH-H-H-H!
|
|
|
| MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE
|
| MORE, MORE, MORE, OH OH, MORE, MORE
|
| MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE
|
| MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE, OH… OH GOD!
|
|
|
| MORE, MORE, MO-MO-MO-MO-MORE, MO-MO-MORE!
|
|
|
| GETTIN’ OFF, GETTIN’ OFF!
|
| BWAH-HAH-HA-HAH, GETTIN’ OFF, GETTIN’ OFF!
|
| BWAH-HAH-HA-HAH, GETTIN’ OFF, GETTIN’ OFF!
|
| BWOH-HOH-HA-HAH, MORE!
|
|
|
| OH GOD, GIMME […], OH MORE, MORE, MORE
|
|
|
| OH GOD, SO GOOD!
|
|
|
| TOUCH IT! TOUCH IT! TOUCH IT! TOUCH IT!
|
|
|
| SKWEEZIT! SKWEEZIT!
|
| [Notes by G. Whillikens] Audio verité. FZ interviews the delightful Annie Zannas and Cynthia Dobson in New York City in 1972. Recorded by FZ, most likely on his portable Uher.
|
|
|
| [Annie Zannas] “Son of a bitch, you did this one, you did that one” he told me
|
| [FZ] How could you do this to him?
|
| [Annie Zannas] I told him that I did something and I was happy for doing it, you know: “I’m happy now, I don’t care, you know, what you think”. “You are happy? I’m more happy than anyone” he said; meanwhile, he’s sittin’ there completely miserable, tellin’ me that he’s more happy than the whole house put together, he has more intelligence than the whole house put together, and he’s sitting there with his dumb words: “Oh, you son of a bitch, you’re a schmuck and you’re a schmuck”, nothing, you know, nice about people, ‘cause all people is shitty to him, you know, and I tried to explain to, I says, that they’re not, you know. It’s just how you take ‘em, I mean, he’s…
|
| [FZ] Why do you call him “Willie the pimp”? ▲
|
| [Annie Zannas] Oh, because we just imagined uh… him… wait…
|
| [Cynthia Dobson] The Lido Hotel
|
| [Annie Zannas] Oh yeah, the Lido Hotel, this perverted hotel in Coney Island, really perverted. So we made up this story about my mother uh… ha ha, calling up Willie telling that we’re a woman uh… body shapes uh… 38-25-40 or something like that, some bizarre shape, blonde hair and all decked out insanely and uh… tell him to meet us in front of the uh… Lido Hotel. And… ha ha, then we… what we were gonna do, if we really would do this, like we’ll make sure, we’ll see him like, you know, casually leave the house at this certain time and we’ll know that, you know, he’s leaving to meet this woman, that’s not gonna be there. Then we’ll have my mother walk by, and see how she’s gonna take it, right? You know, like: “Stella, what’re you doing here? No! You gotta get away!” You know, how is he gonna tell my mother that he’s gonna meet this broad or something, you know? So we made him a pimp, that he gotta pimp my mother off, then he tried to pimp us off.
|
| [Notes by G. Whillikens] The “Mystery Disc #2” sleeve says this was recorded in 1968 at Thee Image in Miami, Florida. An edited, retitled version of this live recording is on “You Can’t Do That on Stage Anymore Vol. 5”. According to those notes, the musicians are Frank Zappa, conductor and vocals, Lowell George on guitar, Roy Estrada on bass, Don Preston on keyboards, Buzz Gardner on trumpet, Ian Underwood on alto sax, Bunk Gardner on tenor sax, Motorhead Sherwood on baritone sax, Jimmy Carl Black on drums, and Art Tripp on drums. The “YCDTOSA Vol. 5” booklet lists this as being recorded in 1969.
|
| [Notes by G. Whillikens] From Criteria Studios, Miami, Florida, 1968. No other information is provided on the “Mystery Disc #2” sleeve. It seems most likely, however, that this was recorded during sessions which actually occurred in 1969. Exact personnel unknown but the musicians credited elsewhere as having participated in these sessions are Frank Zappa on guitar and vocal, Lowell George on guitar, Roy Estrada on bass, Don Preston on keyboards, Buzz Gardner on trumpet, Ian Underwood on alto sax, Bunk Gardner on tenor sax, Motorhead Sherwood on baritone sax, Jimmy Carl Black on drums, and Art Tripp on drums.
|
|
|
| Chucha
|
| Why won’t you accept my proposal?
|
| Don’t you know I’m at your disposal?
|
| Ooh, my Chucha
|
|
|
| Chucha
|
| Why won’t you accept my proposal?
|
| Don’t you know I’m at your disposal?
|
| Chucha
|
|
|
| Accept my proposal
|
| Accept my proposal
|
| ‘Cause I’m at your disposal
|
| ‘Cause I’m at your disposal
|
| Accept my proposal
|
| Accept my proposal
|
| Chucha, my darling, for me
|
|
|
| Your love is fine all of the time
|
| I feel your heartbeat real close to mine
|
| My darling dear
|
|
|
| Please never leave me, please never go
|
| Please don’t deceive me, girl, don’t you know?
|
| My darling dear
|
|
|
| Your love is mine all of the time
|
| I feel your heartbeat real close to mine
|
| My darling dear
|
| [Notes by G. Whillikens] The Mothers explore the meaning of radio. Probably 1968.
|
|
|
| [Bunk Gardner] I’d like to dedicate an ode to Joe Lattanzi who played third base for the North-American Italian Club: “Oh, Joe…”
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Oh, Joe! Joe, Roy. Oh, Joe.
|
| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] Where you going with that thing in your pants?
|
| [Bunk Gardner] This is Bunk “Sweetpants” Gardner
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Sock it to him, guy!
|
| [Bunk Gardner] Why don’t you step out here and pack it to me, Art? Glistening white skin, Art!
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Roy, what did Frank always say? He said we could say anything we want to, didn’t he?
|
| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] Corn on that cob
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] You’d better take care of all those kids, especially Geronimo, Darrell, Gary
|
| [Roy Estrada] Ay, Indio, Indio
|
| [?] Kim
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Gina and Kim
|
| [Roy Estrada] I’m here from Calif, AY!
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Calif, California!
|
| [?] Calif! Oh, man!
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] All right, Santa Ana, California
|
| [Ian Underwood] Roy and Jim have a special uh… kind of form of communication. To illustrate this point, we’ll now have a conversation between Roy and Jim…
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] I refuse!
|
| [Ian Underwood] As if… As if it was happening in the back seat of a car in San Francisco
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] How ‘bout you?
|
| [Roy Estrada] How ‘bout you?
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] How ‘bout you? Pink?
|
| [Roy Estrada] Yeah
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Sure?
|
| [Roy Estrada] Mhm!
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Mhm-hm-mhm!
|
| [Roy Estrada] Estás loco, indio!
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Caray, hombre!
|
| [Roy Estrada] Estás loco
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] Estás loco, estás loco
|
| [Roy Estrada] Wannanennema? Wannanennema? ▶
|
| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] The recipe is available by mail
|
|
|
| [Mothers] Wanna-wanna-wannanennema
|
| Yeah-nema
|
| WOAHH!
|
| RAY COLLINS, WE LOVE YOU
|
| [Ian Underwood] We’ll never forget you
|
| [Roy Estrada] No
|
| [Ian Underwood] We’ll never forget you
|
|
|
| Hratche-plche hratche-plche
|
| Hratche-plche hratche-plche
|
| American way! ▶
|
| Hratche-plche hratche-plche
|
| Ray Ray Ray
|
| Hratche-plche hratche-plche
|
| Help, I’m a rock ▶
|
| Hratche-plche hratche-plche
|
| Hratche-plche hratche-plche
|
| Ray Ray Ray
|
|
|
| [Ian Underwood] Now, ladies and gentlemen, Don Preston
|
| [Don Preston] I have an organ, a piano, a harpsichord uh… uh… forty-five oscillators and uh… that’s my instruments
|
| [Bunk Gardner] I’ve got a uh… bass clarinet, and a clarinet, and a piccolo, and a flute and an alto flute, and a tenor and an alto, and a soprano, and a chanter, and a C melody
|
| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] I have a low cowbell, and a hi cowbell
|
| [?] Oh, Art!
|
| [?] You never heard about that, did you?
|
| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] I have a snare drum and I have a hi tom tom and a low tom tom, I have four melody horns, and they go “beep”, and I have a slapstick which Don Preston graciously gave to me
|
| [Don Preston] And caresses now
|
| [Arthur Dyer Tripp III] And it goes “pap”, and uh… then I have Ga— Bunk Gardner, and whenever I goose him, he goes “bunk”
|
| Bunk bunk
|
| Bunk!
|
| Bunk bunk!
|
| [Ian Underwood] The other half of the percussion section is Jimmy Carl Black who plays…
|
| [Jimmy Carl Black] I have a red set of drums
|
| How you doin’ Gary?
|
| [Ian Underwood] And when… And when the whole band gets together, and plays all these wonderful instruments it sounds like this…
|
| [Notes by G. Whillikens] Fun with a harmonica.
|
 Design by Cal Schenkel.jpg "(Front) Design by Cal Schenkel")
.jpg "(CD inside)")
Songs list
| 
Title origin
| 
Listen original song on YouTube
|