| Album notes by Gail Zappa
|
| This was recorded Live at the Memorial Auditorium on 25 October, 1980, in Buffalo, N.Y. “Oh” says George Douglas “the panties and bra tour”. On the phone he is suddenly right there right now 26 years later. George recalls it as a particularly brutal experience: “It was snowing like crazy, the coldest place I’ve ever been”. And that mixing from the set up onstage (!) was “pretty rugged”. And yet, for him touring with Frank Zappa remains a highlight in his lifelong career in Sound - an “amazing adventure with FZ totally all about the Music”. In order to put the concert together in its entirety we (UMRK) went “warts ‘n all” style with the 3 sources that George had available to cover the show: 2” 24-Track Machine / 1” 8-Track Machine / one cassette board tape. All the multi-track master tapes had to be baked in the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen convection oven prior to transfer. All of the transfers were done at UMRK. We then sent everything on a hard drive to Frank Filipetti in New York.
|
| Some of you might recall that this was the “Crush All Boxes” tour. This is what was printed in ominously stern lettering on the enormous rubbish bin in the parking lot behind the lawyers’ offices where and when we (FZ and me) were “doing” the information gathering for the Warner Brothers lawsuit. This is and was not fun (We were seriously generating file boxes filled with files that if converted to papier mache would have been sufficient to pave Route 66 from here to St. Louis and then to Buffalo and back. We were suffering from Deposition Dementia). The admonition instantly made us laugh as it was such a stern reminder to relax and avoid locking in to all those around us who were steeped in the compartmentalization of the Universe its very Self. Some of the same of you might also remember that the “Tinsel Town rebellion” herein is actually the prequel and an exceedingly different musical animal than the “original” contained in the eponymous album of 1981. Note also that the titles marked with a single asterisk were all new songs, unreleased at the time of this recording.
|
| This is the second of our Vaulternative live concert recordings (see, hear also “FZ - Oz”).
|
| In our efforts here at UMRK to provide you with the finest optional audio entertainment (in the universe) we deploy the inimitably-skilled tape trapper and trenchant trudger of the archivory coastal tundra ▶, Joe Travers, to venture forth (where few are chosen but many have called) into the FZ sequin mines, dismote the ages and identify suitable nuggets for your aural excitation.
|
| A nugget of course is a significant artifact by virtue of being an unreleased composition, a special performance or arrangement, a thrilling example from a less-documented line-up, a rare recording, a highly nutritional trim and/or out, different edits or mixes - a special project, rehearsal, home recording or even a spoken gem such as an interview excerpt, a “build reel” or other “as-is” (unadulterated by FZ or even by us) item, exquisite in quality, uniqueness or hotness anywhereanytimeanyplace (aka AAA - see also AAAFNRAA: anything anytime anywhere for no reason at all), from the breadth and depth of FZ’s career in lifeasweknowit (lawki).
|
| Praise the l.o.r.d. (also a defined term: living on reproduceable data)!
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [FZ] Hi! Welcome to the show tonight, ladies and gentlemen. Hope you’re in the mood for a good time. You’d better be.
|
| Let me introduce you to everybody:
|
| Ike Willis on guitar and vocals
|
| Tommy Mars on keyboards and vocals
|
| Steve Vai on guitar and vocals
|
| Vinnie Colaiuta on drums, vitamin pills and rhythmic encyclopedia
|
| Arthur Barrow on bass and vocals
|
| Bob Harris on keyboards, trumpet and tiny weeny lil’ high vocals
|
| Ray White on guitar and vocals
|
| Not bad! This guy is wearing a shirt that says: “Lick me, my 10th Zappa concert”. Alright. Well, I’m not going to lick you but maybe she will. Go on, lick him. No, a little lower, a little lower. Go for it. It’s the real world. And I know that you’re all intimately acquainted with the real world, otherwise you wouldn’t be here, so… let’s get on with it. Listen… Oh! “Fuck the draft!”, of course, turn it around and put the spotlight on that sign. Stand up and show it to the rest of the audience. Can we get the spotlight down there?
|
| My sentiments exactly. (Ah, no, thanks). OK, you’re ready?
|
| [FZ & Ike Willis] One, two
|
|
|
| Do you know what you are? ▶
|
| You are what you is
|
| You is what you am
|
| (A cow don’t make ham…)
|
| You ain’t what you’re not
|
| So see what you got
|
| You are what you is
|
| An’ that’s all it is
|
|
|
| A foolish young man
|
| From a middle class fam’ly
|
| Started singin’ the blues
|
| ‘Cause he thought it was manly
|
| Now he talks like the Kingfish
|
| (“Saffiiiee!”)
|
| From Amos an’ Andy
|
| “Holy mack’l dere!”
|
| He tells you that chitlins…
|
| Chitlins!
|
| Well, they taste just like candy
|
| He thinks that he’s got
|
| De whole thang down
|
| From the Nivea Lotion
|
| To de Royal Crown
|
|
|
| Do you know what you are?
|
| You are what you is
|
| You is what you am
|
| (A cow don’t make ham…)
|
| You ain’t what you’re not
|
| So see what you got
|
| You are what you is
|
| An’ that’s all it is
|
|
|
| A foolish young man
|
| Of the Negro Persuasion
|
| Devoted his life
|
| To become a Caucasian
|
| He stopped eating pork
|
| He stopped eating greens
|
| He traded his dashiki
|
| “Uhuru!”
|
| For some Jordache Jeans
|
| He learned to play golf
|
| An’ he got a good score
|
| Now he says to himself:
|
| “I AIN’T NO NIGGER NO MORE. HEY! UH! HEY!”
|
|
|
| Do you know what you are?
|
| You are what you is
|
| You is what you am
|
| (A cow don’t make ham…)
|
| You ain’t what you’re not
|
| So see what you got
|
| You are what you is
|
| An’ that’s all it is
|
|
|
| Who is who?
|
| An’ what is what?
|
| An’ why is this…
|
| Appropriot?
|
| If you don’t like
|
| What you has got
|
| Drop it in the dirt
|
| An’ let it rot
|
| Someone else
|
| Will surely come
|
| An’ pick it up
|
| ‘Cause he wants some
|
| And when one day
|
| You wonder who
|
| You used to was
|
| An’ what you do
|
| You’ll scratch your head
|
| An’ look around
|
| But what you lost
|
| Will not be found
|
|
|
| Do you know what you are?
|
| You are what you is
|
| You is what you am
|
| (A cow don’t make ham…)
|
| You ain’t what you’re not
|
| So see what you got
|
| You are what you is
|
| An’ that’s all it is
|
| You are what you is
|
| Aaa-aah
|
| An’ that’s all it is
|
| Ooo-ooh
|
| You are what you is
|
| Aaa-aah
|
| An’ that’s all it is
|
| Ooo-ooh
|
| You are what you is
|
| Aaa-aah
|
| An’ that’s all it is
|
| Ooo-ooh
|
| You are what you is
|
| Aaa-aah
|
| An’ that’s all it is
|
| And here we are, at the Mudd Club, y’all
|
| I hope you enjoy yourself ‘cause the show’s about to begin…
|
|
|
| Hey, they’re really dancin’, they’re on auto-destruct
|
| On the floor, on the pipe, bouncin’ off-a the wall
|
| Hey, the people here are really tearin’ it up
|
| On the side, in the back, by the front of the stage
|
| They ain’t really crazy (you can take it from me)
|
| I should know ‘cause I go every time I’m in town
|
| If you never tried it, lemme straighten you out
|
| It’s the best kinda place to unfasten yerself
|
|
|
| Mudd Club
|
| All the way downtown
|
| Mudd Club
|
| They ain’t messin’ around
|
| Mudd Club
|
| Just turn to the left an’ look around because it’s there somewhere
|
| If you ain’t found it, better hurry up
|
| Because the folks down there’s on auto-destruct
|
| And so can you be too!
|
| (The fact of the matter it’s made for you!)
|
|
|
| Try it on a Saturday about four o’clock in the mornin’ or even on a Monday at midnight, when there’s just a few of them Fabulous Poodles, doin’ the ♫ Peppermint Twist for real, in a black sack dress with nine inch heels
|
| And then a guy with a blue Mohawk comes in, in Serious Leather…
|
| (And all the rest of whom for which to whensonever of partially indeterminate bio-chemical degradation seek the path to the sudsy yellow nozzle of their foaming nocturnal parametric whole-wheat inter-faith geo-thermal terpsichorean ejectamenta!)
|
|
|
| In Serious Leather…
|
| In Serious Chains
|
| In serious types of clothing
|
| From when they come downtown
|
| From the ruins of Studio 54
|
| To twist an’ frugg
|
| In an arrogant gesture
|
| To the best of what the 20th Century has to offer
|
| And I do mean offer
|
| At the Mudd Club
|
|
|
| Now listen…
|
| Al Malkin is down there right now
|
| Looking for a virgin with nice breath…
|
| (Maybe it’s you, John… and you don’t even know it!)
|
|
|
| Hey, they’re really dancin’, they’re on auto-destruct
|
| On the floor, on the pipe, bouncin’ off-a the wall
|
| Hey, the people here are really tearin’ it up
|
| On the side, in the back, by the front of the stage
|
| They ain’t really crazy (you can take it from me)
|
| I should know ‘cause I go every time I’m in town
|
| If you never tried it, lemme straighten you out
|
| It’s the best kinda place to unfasten yerself
|
| While you work the wall ▶
|
| Work the floor
|
| Work the pipe
|
| In serious pain
|
|
|
| Some take the bible for what it’s worth
|
| When it says that the meek shall inherit the Earth
|
| Well, I heard that some sheik has bought New Jersey last week
|
| An’ you, suckers, ain’t gettin’ nothin’
|
|
|
| Is Hare Rama really wrong
|
| If you wander around with a napkin on
|
| With a bell on a stick an’ your hair is all gone?
|
| The geek shall inherit nothin’
|
|
|
| You say yer life’s a bum deal an’ you’re up against the wall…
|
| Well, people, you ain’t even got no kinda deal at all
|
| ‘Cause what they do in Washington
|
| They just takes care of NUMBER ONE an’ NUMBER ONE ain’t YOU
|
| You ain’t even NUMBER TWO
|
|
|
| (That’s right!)
|
|
|
| Those Jesus Freaks, well, they’re friendly but
|
| The shit they believe has got their minds all shut
|
| An’ they don’t even care when the church takes a cut
|
| Ain’t it bleak when you got so much nothin’?
|
| So whaddya do? Hey!
|
|
|
| Eat that pork, eat that ham
|
| Laugh till ya choke on Billy Graham
|
| Moses, Aaron an’ Abraham…
|
| They’re all a waste of time
|
| An’ it’s your ass that’s on the line
|
| IT’S YOUR ASS THAT’S ON THE LINE
|
|
|
| Do what you wanna, do what you will
|
| Just don’t mess up your neighbor’s thrill
|
| An’ when you pay the bill kindly leave a little tip
|
| And help the next poor sucker on his one-way trip…
|
|
|
| SOME TAKE THE BIBLE…
|
|
|
| (Aw, gimme a half a dozen for the hotel room!)
|
| The mystery man came over
|
| An’ he said: “I’m outasite”
|
| He said for a nominal service charge
|
| I could reach Nervonna tonite
|
|
|
| If I was ready, willing an’ able ▶
|
| To pay him his regular fee
|
| He would drop all the rest of his pressing affairs
|
| And devote his attention to me
|
| But I said:
|
|
|
| “Look here, brother, who you jivin’ with that cosmik debris?
|
| Now, who you jivin’ with that cosmik debris?
|
| Look here, brother, don’t you waste your time on me”
|
|
|
| The mystery man got nervous
|
| An’ he fidget around a bit
|
| He reached in the pocket of his mystery robe
|
| An’ he whipped out a shaving kit
|
|
|
| Now, I thought it was a razor
|
| An’ a can of foamin’ goo
|
| But I told him right then when the top popped open
|
| There was nothin’ his box won’t do
|
|
|
| With the oil of Afro Dytee
|
| An’ the dust of the Grand Wazoo ▶
|
| He said: “You might not believe this, little fella, but it’ll cure your asthma too!”
|
| An’ I said:
|
|
|
| “Look here, brother, who you jivin’ with that cosmik debris?
|
| Now, what kind of a geroo are you anyway?
|
| Look here, brother, don’t you waste your time on me
|
| That’s right, don’t waste your time…”
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| “I’ve got troubles of my own” I said
|
| “An’ you can’t help me out
|
| So take your meditations an’ your preparations
|
| An’ cram it up yer snout”
|
|
|
| “BUT I GOT A KRISTL BOLE!”
|
| He said, an’ held it on up to the light
|
| So I snatched it all away from him
|
| An’ I showed him how to do it right
|
|
|
| I wrapped a newspaper ‘round my head
|
| So I’d look like I was Deep
|
| Said some mumbo jumbos then
|
| I told him he was goin’ to sleep
|
|
|
| I robbed his rings an’ his pocket watch
|
| An’ everything else I found
|
| Shit, I had that sucker hypnotized
|
| He couldn’t even make a sound
|
|
|
| I proceeded to tell him his future then
|
| As long as he was hanging around
|
| I said: “The price of meat has just gone up
|
| An’ yer ol’ lady has just gone down…”
|
|
|
| Look here, brother, who you jivin’ with that cosmik debris?
|
| (Now, is that a real poncho or is that a Sears poncho ▶, huh?)
|
|
|
| Don’t you know? You could make more money as a butcher
|
| So don’t you waste your time on me
|
| Don’t waste it, don’t waste your time on me
|
| Ohm shanti, ohm shanti, ohm shanti ohm
|
| Thank you!
|
|
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Roll it over an’ grease it down, I’ll drive you through the heart of town
|
|
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Roll it over an’ grease it down, I’ll drive you through the heart of town
|
|
|
| Hey, all the good women, they sure has it tough
|
| The good men, well, there just ain’t enough
|
| All the good girls are lookin’ all the time
|
| Good men is something that they can’t find
|
| But if they find one miraculously
|
| They try to be lovin’ as they can be
|
| But if they find one and let him go
|
| Chances are they might not never find one no mo’
|
| So they…
|
|
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Roll it over an’ grease it down, I’ll drive you through the heart of town
|
|
|
| A good lovin’ man is hardest to find
|
| A good woman needs to ease her mind
|
| And I know a few that need to ease it behind
|
| All y’gotta do is grease it down and everything is fine
|
|
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Roll it over an’ grease it down, I’ll drive you through the heart of town
|
|
|
| A girl don’t need
|
| No fancy grease
|
| To get herself
|
| Some rump release
|
| Any kind
|
| Of lube’ll do
|
| Maybe from another
|
| Part of you
|
| Lube from the North
|
| Lube from the South
|
| Take a little slobber
|
| From the side of your mouth
|
| From your mouth
|
| From your mouth
|
| From your mouth
|
| From your mouth
|
| Roll it over
|
| Grease it dow-in
|
| Here come that crazy screamin’ sound…
|
|
|
| Aaah… ah-ah-a-aah
|
| Come on, sing along!
|
| Aaah… ah-ah-a-aah
|
| Aaah… ah-ah-a-aah
|
| Oh nooo!
|
| Aaah… ah-ah-a-aah
|
|
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Keep it greasy, so it’ll go down easy
|
| Roll it over an’ grease it down, down, down
|
| GREASE IT DOW-HOW-HOWN
|
| Oh no! Here comes that screamin’ sound again…
|
| [FZ] Thank you! This is a song about the punk bands that come from Los Angeles.
|
|
|
| From Madame Wong’s to Starwood to the Whisky on the Strip
|
| You can hear the crashing, blasting strum of bands that come to be real hip
|
| And get a record contract from a talent scout someday
|
| They’ll sell their ass, their cocks and balls, they’ll take the check an’ walk away
|
|
|
| If they’re lucky they’ll get famous for a week or two perhaps
|
| They’ll buy some ugly clothes to wear and hope the business don’t collapse
|
| Before some stupid magazine decides they’re really good
|
| They’re a Tinsel Town Rebellion Band from downtown Hollywood!
|
|
|
| Tinsel Town Rebellion
|
| Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
|
| Tinsel Town Rebellion
|
| Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
|
|
|
| They used to play all kinds of stuff and some of it was nice
|
| Some of it was musical, but then they took this guy’s advice
|
| To get a record deal, he said, they’d have to be more PUNK
|
| Forget their chops and play real dumb or else they would be sunk
|
|
|
| So off they go to S.I.R. to learn some stupid riffs
|
| And practice all their poses in between their powder sniffs
|
| Chop a line now
|
|
|
| And when they think they’ve got it
|
| They launch a new career
|
| Who gives a fuck if what they play
|
| Is somewhat insincere?
|
|
|
| Tinsel Town Rebellion
|
| Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
|
| Tinsel Town Rebellion
|
| Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
|
|
|
| In Tinsel Town the people there, they think substance is a bore
|
| And if your New Wave group looks good they’ll hurry on back for more
|
| Of leather groups and plastic groups and groups that act real queer
|
| The Tinsel Town aficionados come to see and not to hear
|
| But then again this system works as perfect as a dream
|
| It works for all of those record company pricks who come to skim the… CREAM
|
| From the cesspools of excitement where Jim Morrison once stood
|
| It’s the Tinsel Town Rebellion from downtown Hollywood!
|
| [FZ] There is a ship arriving too late
|
| To save a drowned-ing kind of a witch
|
| She was swimmin’ along, tryin’ to keep a date
|
| With a Merchant Marine who told her he was really rich
|
|
|
| But it doesn’t matter no more…
|
| She’s on the ocean floor
|
| An’ the water’s all green down there
|
| An’ it’s not very clean down there
|
|
|
| An’ the pointed hat
|
| Well, she’s got water in that
|
| An’ water snakes an’ rusty wrecks
|
| Is all that she can see
|
| As the light goes dim and she’s tryin’ to swim
|
| Will she make it?
|
| Boy, we sure hope so…
|
|
|
| Not even a witch oughta be caught on the bottom of America’s spew-infested waterways
|
| She could get radiation all over her
|
| She could mutate insanely…
|
| And then if she ever got out of the liquid entrapment
|
| She could grow to be 15 feet tall and scary-lookin’
|
| Even more so than a pre-moistened ▶ witch oughta be
|
| And then she might go on the freeway
|
| She could cause accidents
|
| While people looked at her
|
| Cars could crash all over the place from the result of people with Hawaiian shirts ▶ on…
|
| Lookin’ up to see her face
|
| With seaweed and urchins
|
| Emphasizing her cheekbones
|
| Wow! She can really be ugly and scary-looking
|
|
|
| Sardines in her eyebrows
|
| Lobsters up an’ down her forehead
|
| All of them terribly large from radiation…
|
| And DANGEROUS!
|
| And smelling very bad
|
|
|
| I don’t know
|
| Maybe it’s better if she stays in the water
|
| And a submarine could save her
|
| And take her home to the Navy…
|
| For some kind of ritual sacrifice…
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a man like me?
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a man like me?
|
|
|
| He was the Playboy Type (he smoked a pipe)
|
| His fav’rite phrase was “Outa-site”
|
| He had an Irish Setter
|
| Ah, Bejeezus, here we go again
|
|
|
| It was a singles bar…
|
| (Wait a minute, let’s do that part again)
|
| It was a singles bar
|
| Da-da-dah, the band was tight
|
| They did the Bump together
|
|
|
| What a splendid sight
|
| Roon doon doon doon
|
| Her teeth were white
|
| Oo-ooh ah-ooh
|
| The drinks were cheap (it was Ladies Nite)
|
| He was glad that he met her
|
|
|
| She was an office girl, “MY NAME IS BETTY”
|
| Her fav’rite group was HELEN REDDY
|
| (They discussed the weather!)
|
|
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a man like me?
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a man like me?
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a…
|
| Baby, don’t you want a…
|
| Baby, don’t you want a MAN!
|
|
|
| She was a lonely sort, just a little too short
|
| Her jokes were dumb and her fav’rite sport
|
| Was hockey (in the winter)
|
| [Mumble]
|
|
|
| He was duly impressed and was quick to suggest
|
| Any sport with a PUCK…
|
| (Why can’t I remember the words of this song?)
|
|
|
| He was duly impressed and was quick to suggest
|
| Any sport with a PUCK had to be ‘bout the best
|
| As he jabbed his elbow in her
|
|
|
| Later on they went off to where the music was soft
|
| The candles were drippy, they saw a real hippy
|
| Who delivered their dinner
|
|
|
| The rice was brown and soon they found
|
| That the crowd around that had jammed the room
|
| Well, it seemed to be getting thinner
|
|
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a man like me?
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a man like me?
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a…
|
| Baby, don’t you want a…
|
| Baby, don’t you want a MAN!
|
|
|
| He took her home to a motor court
|
| Tried to kiss her (Tried to ignore it)
|
| (Wait a minute, no… no, no, I got it backwards)
|
|
|
| He took her home to a motor court
|
| She tried to kiss… (Wouldn’t kiss him)
|
| AND MADE HIM ANGRY!
|
| I got so damn mad I could have grabbed that […]
|
|
|
| He called her a…
|
| And she slammed the door
|
| The door!
|
| In a petulant frenzy!
|
| A petulant frenzy!
|
| This is a petulant frenzy!
|
| Oh-uh oh-uh
|
| I’m petulant
|
| And I’m having a frenzy!
|
|
|
| On the sofa she weeps
|
| BOO HOO HOO HOO!
|
| She weeps and she weeps
|
| BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO!
|
| She weeps and she peeps through the curtain
|
|
|
| He just got in his car
|
| But the battery’s dead
|
| So he asked to use the phone
|
| And she gives him some head
|
| And that’s the end of the story
|
|
|
| Ooh! ✄ Atlantis! ▶
|
|
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a man like me?
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a man like me?
|
| Honey, honey, hey
|
| Baby, don’t you want a…
|
| Baby, don’t you want a…
|
| Baby, don’t you want a MAN!
|
|
|
| Baby, don’t you want a MAN sometimes?
|
| Can you see what they are? Do you hear what they say? People, it is sad but true
|
| They dress really stupid but they think they’re OK and they got no use for you
|
| Oh, the dead girls of London, why do they act that way?
|
|
|
| Maybe it’s the water, mama, maybe it’s the tea
|
| Maybe it’s the way they was raised
|
| Maybe it’s the stuff what they read in the papers keeps ‘em lookin’ sorta half in a daze
|
| Oh, the dead girls of London, why do they act that way?
|
|
|
| We’re the dead girls of London
|
| We thinks we are fine
|
| We ain’t hittin’ on nothin’
|
| But the boutique frame of mind
|
|
|
| (Come on, Dempsey!)
|
|
|
| You see ‘em dancing at the disco every night like a bunch of little robot queens
|
| Making little noises full of fake delight but they’re really just so full of beans
|
| Oh, the dead girls of London, why do they act that way?
|
|
|
| We’re the dead girls of London
|
| We thinks we are fine
|
| We ain’t hittin’ on nothin’
|
| But the BONJOUR frame of mind
|
|
|
| Bonjour!
|
| Bonjour!
|
| [Repeat]
|
| Mike Scheller says his life is a mess
|
| Fritz Rau says asparagus
|
| Should only be consumed
|
| By people with a large amount
|
| In an unmarked bank account
|
| Ou-ou-ou-ou-ount
|
|
|
| Shall we take ourselves seriously?
|
| Shall we talk about it all night long?
|
| Shall we think we are so evolved?
|
| Will we be depressed if we’re wrong?
|
|
|
| Shall we take ourselves seriously?
|
| Shall we take ourselves elsewhere?
|
| Shall we drink while we squat there
|
| In the middle of this stupid song?
|
|
|
| Shall we never go out there?
|
| Shall we take us where we don’t belong
|
| When we notice the Spargel is gone?
|
| Shall we weep in the box office dawn?
|
|
|
| ✄ Go away, I’m no good for you
|
|
|
| Are the tickets all counted?
|
| Are the costs all accounted for?
|
| Shall we bring up the Spargel
|
| For discussion at least once more?
|
|
|
| Shall we take ourselves seriously?
|
| Shall we think we are so mature?
|
| Shall we be very wrong at the end of this song?
|
| Yes, we will ever more!
|
| Yes, we will ever more!
|
| [Ray White] City of tiny lites
|
| Don’t you wanna go?
|
| Hear the tiny auto horns
|
| When they tiny blow
|
|
|
| Tiny lightnin’
|
| In the storm
|
| Tiny blankets
|
| Gonna keep you warm
|
| Tiny pillows
|
| Tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny sheets
|
| Talkin’ ‘bout the tiny cookies
|
| That the peoples eat
|
|
|
| City of tiny lites
|
| Maybe you should know
|
| That it’s over there
|
| In the tiny dirt somewhere
|
|
|
| You can see it any time
|
| When you get the squints
|
| From your downers and your wine
|
| [FZ] You’re so big
|
| It’s so tiny
|
| Every cloud is silver line-y
|
| The great escape for all of you
|
|
|
| Tiny is as tiny do
|
| Tiny is as tiny do
|
| Tiny is as tiny do
|
| Tiny is as tiny do
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [Ray White] City of tiny lites
|
| Don’t you wanna go?
|
| Hear the tiny auto horns
|
| When they tiny blow
|
|
|
| Tiny lightnin’
|
| In the storm
|
| Tiny pillows, tiny blankets, yeah
|
| Gonna keep, keep, keep you so warm
|
| Tiny pillows
|
| Tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny sheets
|
| Talkin’ ‘bout the tiny cookies
|
| That the peoples eat
|
| Oh, city of tiny lites
|
| Maybe… Maybe you should know
|
|
|
| And it’s over there
|
| Well, and it’s over there
|
| Said, and it’s over there
|
| Well, and it’s over there
|
| This girl is easy meat
|
| I seen her on the street
|
| See-through blouse ▶ an’ a tiny little dress
|
| Her manner indiscreet…
|
| I knew she was…
|
|
|
| Easy, easy, easy meat
|
| Easy, easy, easy meat
|
| Easy, easy…
|
| Easy, easy…
|
| Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat
|
|
|
| She wanna take me home
|
| Make me sweat and moan
|
| Rub my head and beat me off
|
| With a copy of Rolling Stone
|
|
|
| Easy, easy, easy meat
|
| Easy, easy, easy meat
|
| Easy, easy…
|
| Easy, easy…
|
| Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| I told her I was late
|
| I had another date
|
| I can’t get off on the Rolling Stone
|
| But the robots think it’s great…
|
| I knew she was…
|
|
|
| Easy, easy, easy meat
|
| Easy, easy, easy meat
|
| Easy, easy…
|
| Easy, easy…
|
| Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat
|
|
|
| Easy…
|
| She was so easy
|
| Easy…
|
| I saw her tiny titties shooh her tee-shooh— ha ha!
|
|
|
| I saw her tiny titties shooh her—
|
|
|
| I saw her tiny titties through her see-through blouse
|
| Just had to take the girl to my house
|
| Easy… MEAT!
|
| Ain’t got no heart
|
| I ain’t got no heart to give away
|
| I sit and laugh at fools in love
|
| There ain’t no such thing as love
|
| Ha ha ha!
|
| No angels singing up above today
|
|
|
| Girl, I don’t believe
|
| Girl, I don’t believe in what you say
|
| You say your heart is only mine
|
| I say to you: “You must be blind
|
| What makes you think that you’re so fine
|
|
|
| That I would throw away
|
| The groovy life I lead?
|
| ‘Cause, baby, what you got, yeah
|
| It sure ain’t what I need
|
|
|
| Girl, you’d better go
|
| Girl, you’d better go away
|
| I think that life with you would be
|
| Just not quite the thing for me
|
| Why is it so hard to see my way?
|
|
|
| Why should I be stuck with you?
|
| Stuck with you
|
| It’s just not what I want to do
|
| Want to do
|
| Why should an embrace or two
|
| Embrace or two
|
| Make me such a part of you?”
|
| Part of you
|
| I ain’t got no heart to give away
|
| Away
|
| No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
|
| Ain’t got no heart
|
| Ain’t got no heart
|
| I ain’t got no heart to give away!
|
| [FZ] Thank you!
|
|
|
| Flies all green an’ buzzin’ in his dungeon of despair
|
| Prisoners grumble and piss their clothes and scratch their matted hair
|
| A tiny little light from a window hole a hundred yards away
|
| Is all they ever get to know about the regular life in the day
|
|
|
| [FZ & Ike Willis] An’ it stinks so bad, the stones been chokin’ an’ weepin’ greenish drops
|
| In the room where the giant fire puffer works an’ the torture never stops
|
| The torture never stops
|
| The torture…
|
| Ay!
|
| The torture…
|
| Ay!
|
| The torture never stops
|
|
|
| [FZ] Slime an’ rot, rats an’ snot an’ vomit on the floor
|
| Fifty ugly soldiers holdin’ spears by the iron door
|
| Knives an’ spikes an’ guns and the likes of every tool of pain
|
| An’ a sinister little midget with a bucket an’ a mop…
|
| A sinister little midget with a bucket an’ a mop…
|
| A sinister tiny little midget with a bucket an’ a mop where the blood goes down the drain
|
|
|
| [FZ & Ike Willis] An’ it stinks so bad, the stones been chokin’ an’ weepin’ greenish drops
|
| In the room where the giant fire puffer works an’ the torture never stops
|
| The torture never stops
|
| The torture…
|
| Ay!
|
| The torture…
|
| Ay!
|
| The torture never stops
|
|
|
| [FZ] Flies all green an’ buzzin’ in his dungeon of despair
|
| An evil kind of a prince eats a steamin’ kind of a pig in a chamber right near there
|
| He eats the snouts an’ the trotters first
|
| The loins an’ the groins are soon dispersed
|
| His carvin’ style is well rehearsed
|
|
|
| He stands and shouts:
|
| “All men be cursed”
|
| “All men be cursed”
|
| “All men be cursed”
|
| And disagree, well, let me tell you, no-one durst
|
| He’s the best of course of all the worst
|
| He’s the best of course of all the worst
|
| Some wrong been done, he done it first
|
| Some wrong been done, he done it first
|
|
|
| [FZ & Ike Willis] An’ he stinks so bad, his bones been chokin’ an’ weepin’ greenish drops
|
| In the night of the iron sausage where the torture never stops
|
| The torture never stops
|
| The torture…
|
| Ay!
|
| The torture…
|
| Ay!
|
| The torture never stops
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [FZ] Flies all green an’ buzzin’ in his dungeon of despair
|
| Who are all these people that is locked away down there?
|
| Are they crazy?
|
| Are they sainted?
|
| Are they zeros someone painted?
|
|
|
| Well, it’s never been explained since at first it was created
|
| But a dungeon, just like a sin
|
| Requires naught but lockin’ in
|
| Of everything that’s ever been
|
| Look at her
|
| Look at him
|
|
|
| That’s what’s the deal we’re dealing in
|
| That’s what’s the deal we’re dealing in
|
| That’s what’s the deal we’re dealing in
|
| That’s what’s the deal we’re dealing in
|
| Hey! Do you know what you are?
|
| You’re an asshole! Asshole!
|
|
|
| Some of you might not agree
|
| ‘Cause you probably likes a lot of misery
|
| But think a while and you will see…
|
|
|
| Broken hearts are for assholes
|
| Broken hearts are for assholes
|
| Are you an asshole?
|
| Broken hearts are for assholes
|
| Are you an asshole too?
|
| Whatcha gonna do, ‘cause you’re an asshole…
|
|
|
| No, no, no, yeah, yeah, yeah, I said, you are an asshole!
|
|
|
| Maybe you think you’re a lonely guy
|
| An’ maybe you think you’re too tough to cry
|
| So you went to the Grape just to give it a try
|
|
|
| And Dagmar
|
| Was his name…
|
|
|
| The whiskers sticking out from underneath of his pancake make-up
|
| Nearly drove you insane
|
| And so you kissed a little sailor
|
| Who had just blew in from Spain
|
| You pulled the chain attached to the permanently-erected nipples of Jimmy
|
| In a bold salute to pain
|
|
|
| You sniffed the reeking buns of Angel
|
| And acted like it was cocaine
|
|
|
| You were dazzled by the exciting new costume of Ko-Ko
|
| In a way you can’t explain
|
|
|
| And so you worked the wall with Michael
|
| Which gave your back an awful strain
|
| But you came back on Sunday for the Gong Show
|
| But you forgot what I was sayin’…
|
|
|
| ‘Cause you’re an asshole, you’re an asshole
|
| That’s right!
|
| You’re an asshole, you’re an asshole
|
| That’s right!
|
| You’re an asshole, you’re an asshole
|
| That’s right!
|
| You’re an asshole, you’re an asshole
|
|
|
| Well, you been to the Grape, you been to the Chest
|
| Now I think you know what you are: you’re an asshole, asshole
|
|
|
| You say you can’t live with what you’ve been through
|
| Well, ladies, you can be an asshole too
|
| You might pretend you ain’t got one on the bottom of you
|
|
|
| But don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s lookin’ at you
|
| Don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s winkin’ at you
|
| Don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s blinkin’ at you
|
| That’s why I say…
|
|
|
| I’m gonna ram it, ram it, ram it, ram it up yer poop chute
|
| Corn hole
|
| Ram it, ram it, ram it, ram it up yer poop chute
|
| Fist fuck
|
| Ram it, ram it, ram it, ram it up yer poop chute
|
| Wrist-watch; Crisco
|
| Ram it, ram it, ram it, ram it up yer poop chute
|
| AH!
|
|
|
| Don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s goin’ right up yer poop chute
|
| Don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s goin’ right up yer poop chute
|
| Don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s goin’ right up yer poop chute
|
| Ay ay ay ay
|
| Don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s goin’ right up yer poop chute
|
| Ay ay ay ay
|
| Don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s goin’ right up yer poooop chute
|
| Ay ay ay ay ay ay ay ay
|
| Don’t fool yerself, girl
|
| It’s goin’ right up yer…
|
| Aw, I knew you’d be surprised…
|
| One, two, three, four
|
|
|
| Feelin’ sorry
|
| Feelin’ sad
|
| So many ugly people
|
| I feel bad
|
|
|
| I’m so cute
|
| They’re so homely
|
| Some of them
|
| At home an’ lonely
|
|
|
| Wish they could be
|
| Very cute like me
|
| They will never
|
| Get to be
|
|
|
| Some folks got it
|
| Some folks don’t
|
| Some so ugly
|
| They never won’t
|
|
|
| Everybody see my hair
|
| See my clothes, I’m sure you care
|
| Vinnie C. is really neat
|
| Watch the way he eat the beat
|
|
|
| Sweet as honey, he’s a piece of cake
|
| Full of starch and sausage as he did bake
|
| Vitamin pills he never takes
|
| Watch him while his glasses break
|
| Glasses break
|
| Glasses break
|
| They must be fake
|
|
|
| Step aside
|
| I wanna stride
|
| I’m gonna strut
|
| I’m gonna slide
|
|
|
| Hey, ugly folks
|
| Go get some cyanide
|
| An’ die
|
| DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE
|
|
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-uh-rennda
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen
|
| A-rennda-rennda-rahhh
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-uh-rennda
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen
|
| A-rennda-rennda-rahhh
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-uh-rennda
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen
|
| A-rennda-rennda-rahhh
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-uh-rennda
|
| A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen
|
| A-rennda-rennda-rahhh
|
|
|
| Ugly is bad
|
| Bad is wrong
|
| Wrong is sinful
|
| And sin leads to eternal damnation
|
| An’ hot burnin’ fire
|
| Hot burnin’ fire
|
| Hot burnin’ fire
|
| Hot burnin’ fire
|
| Screams of agony
|
| Screams of agony
|
| Screams of agony
|
| Screams of agony
|
| Arrrrrrghhhh!
|
| Ah ah ah
|
| Is there anything good inside of you? If there is, I really wanna know
|
| Is there anything good inside of you?
|
| If there is, I really wanna…
|
| Know
|
| Is there anything…
|
| Good inside of you? If there is, I really wanna…
|
| Know
|
| Is there?
|
|
|
| Is there anything good inside of you?
|
| If there is, I really wanna know
|
| Is there anything good inside of you?
|
| If there is, I really wanna, really wanna know
|
|
|
| Something
|
| Anything
|
| Something
|
| Anything
|
|
|
| Show me a sign, if you don’t mind
|
| Show me a sign, if you don’t mind
|
| Show me a sign, if you don’t mind
|
| Show me a sign, if you don’t mind
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| Do you know what I’m really telling you?
|
| Is it something that you can understand?
|
| Do you know what I’m really telling you?
|
| Is it something that you can understand?
|
| Do you know what I’m really telling you?
|
| Is it something that you can understand?
|
| Do you know what I’m really telling you?
|
| Is it something that you can understand?
|
|
|
| Andy de vine (de vine)
|
| Had a thong rind (rind)
|
| It was sublime (sublime)
|
| But the wrong kind
|
|
|
| Andy de vine (de vine)
|
| Had a thong rind (rind)
|
| It was sublime (sublime)
|
| But the wrong kind
|
|
|
| Have I aligned
|
| With a blown mind?
|
| Wasted my time
|
| On a drawn blind?
|
|
|
| Have I aligned
|
| With a blown mind?
|
| Wasted my time
|
| On a drawn blind?
|
|
|
| Oh, Andy…
|
| Andy
|
| Andy, Andy
|
| A thong rind
|
| It was sublime, now y’all
|
| But the wrong kind
|
| Hah-hah-hah-hah
|
| Come on now
|
| Yeah yeah yeah yeah hey yeah
|
|
|
| [FZ] Ike, Tommy, Steve, Vinnie, Arthur, Bob, Ray. Thanks for coming to the show, hope you enjoyed it. Good night.
|
| [FZ] Ready?
|
| One, two, three, four
|
|
|
| It wasn’t very large, there was just enough room to cram the drums
|
| In the corner over by the Dodge it was a fifty-four with a mashed up door
|
| And a cheesy little amp with a sign on the front said “Fender Champ”
|
| And a second-hand guitar, it was a Stratocaster with a whammy bar
|
|
|
| We could jam in Joe’s garage, his mama was screamin’, his dad was mad
|
| We was playin’ the same old song in the afternoon an’ sometimes we would
|
| Play it all night long, it was all we knew, an’ easy too
|
| So we wouldn’t get it wrong, even if you played it on a saxophone
|
|
|
| We thought we was pretty good, we talked about keepin’ the band together
|
| An’ we figured that we should ‘cause about this time we was gettin’ the eye
|
| From the girls in the neighborhood, they’d all come over an’ dance around like…
|
| […]
|
|
|
| So we picked out a stupid name, had some cards printed up for a coupla bucks
|
| An’ we was on our way to fame, got matching suits an’ Beatle boots
|
| An’ a sign on the back of the car an’ we was ready to work in a go-go bar
|
| ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, LET’S SEE IF YOU’VE GOT SOME MORE!
|
|
|
| People seemed to like our song, they got up an’ danced an’ made a lotta noise
|
| An’ it wasn’t ‘fore very long, a guy from a company we can’t name
|
| Said we oughta take his pen an’ sign on the line for a real good time
|
| But he didn’t tell us when these “good times” would be somethin’ that was really happenin’
|
| So the band broke up an’ it looks like (ooh-ooh) we will never play again…
|
|
|
| Guess you only get one chance in life to play a song that goes like…
|
| I don’t know much about dancin’, that’s why I got this song
|
| One of my legs is shorter than the other ▶ an’ both my feet’s too long
|
| ‘Course now right along with ‘em, I got no natural rhythm
|
| But I go dancin’ every night, hopin’ one day I might get it right
|
|
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| Dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| Dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
|
|
| I hear that beat, I jump outta my seat, but I can’t compete
|
| ‘Cause I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| Dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
|
|
| The disco folks all dressed up like they’s fit to kill
|
| I walk on in an’ see ‘em there gonna give them all a thrill
|
| When they see me comin’ they all steps aside
|
| They has a fit while I commit my social suicide
|
|
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| Dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| Dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
|
|
| The beat goes on but I’m so wrong
|
| Wrong
|
| Well, the beat goes on but I’m so wrong
|
| Wrong
|
|
|
| The beat goes on but I’m so wrong
|
| The beat goes on but I’m so wrong
|
| The beat goes on but I’m so wrong
|
| The beat goes on but I’m so wrong
|
|
|
| I may be totally wrong but I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| I may be totally wrong but I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
|
|
| ✄ Yowsa, yowsa, yowsa!
|
|
|
| I got it all together now with my very own disco clothes, hey!
|
| My shirt’s half open, t’show you my chain an’ the spoon for up my nose
|
| “I am really somethin’”, that’s what you’d probably say
|
| So smoke your little smoke and drink your little drink, while I dance the night away
|
|
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| Dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| Dancin’ fool
|
| I’m a… dancin’ fool
|
| HE’S A… DANCIN’ FOOL
|
|
|
| I may be totally wrong but I’m a…
|
| I may be totally wrong but I’m a…
|
| I may be totally wrong but I’m a…
|
| I may be totally wrong but I’m a FOOL-UH!
|
|
|
| Say, darlin’… can I buy you a drink?
|
| Ki-ni-shinai!
|
| What’s a girl like you doin’ in a tampoon-encrusted place like this?
|
| Ki-ni-shinai!
|
| Do you come here often?
|
| Ki-ni-shinai!
|
| And if so, WHY?
|
| Ki-ni-shinai!
|
| Wait a minute… I’ve got it… you’re an Italian!
|
| Ki-ni-shinai!
|
| What? You’re Jewish?
|
| Love your nails…
|
| You must be a Libra…
|
| Ki-ni-shinai!
|
| Your place or mine?
|
| [FZ] You know, you’ve heard those lines so many times. You go into a disco and you hear these people sitting around, desperately trying to get a little action. Now, isn’t it DISGUSTING the things that people will say to each other when all they wanna do is just ga— get down to a little wholesome POOCHING after the event?
|
| Now, ladies and gentlemen, I think that it’s only fair, since th— the theme of our show tonight has been The Real World, that we make an earnest effort to deal with these problems in a forthright manner. You know what I mean?
|
| So look, I know that you… you’re gonna leave this place eventually and you’re gonna go and maybe you’ll go someplace, you might even go to a disco kind of a place, I know how you are. And when you go in there, you’re gonna… yes, you will, I know you will. He will! And so will she. ‘Cause I’ve seen ‘em there. But when you go there, I know what you’re going to do.
|
| You’re gonna walk in
|
| You’re gonna check it out a couple of times
|
| You’re gonna walk over to the bar
|
| To see if there’s any immediate grunt-type action over there
|
| And if there’s not
|
| You’re gonna spin around a couple of times
|
| And look kind of nonchalant
|
| Then you’re gonna look around the room to see if there’s
|
| ANYBODY THERE YOU KNOW
|
| And if there’s somebody there you know
|
| You’ll go over and sit at the table with him
|
| And you’ll look around to see if there’s any PUSSY coming in later
|
| And you’ll sit there and you’ll keep watching the door
|
| And then you’ll watch the floor
|
| And then you’ll get lucky, oh my God
|
| Here comes one, here’s one worth striving for
|
| She’s… She’s training to be a nurse
|
| She looks clean
|
| No potential of disease here
|
| It looks like The Big One
|
| Yes, you’re gonna try for it, AREN’T YOU?
|
| Who knows? Maybe you’ll do good, maybe you won’t, but you gotta try, because she looks like a nurse, right? No diseases and you gotta try.
|
| So…
|
| She’s coming in
|
| She has a girlfriend
|
| Her girlfriend is UGLY
|
| Because cute girls always have UGLY girlfriends, and the reason that they have UGLY girlfriends is because it makes them look CUTER!
|
| The girls come into the disco
|
| There they are
|
| They’re getting ready for some action
|
| They don’t want anybody to know that they wanna get FUCKED ALL NIGHT LONG
|
| Girls that are training to be nurses with ugly girlfriends
|
| Don’t want people to know that’s what they REALLY WANT
|
| So when they walk in, what do they do?
|
| They look around
|
| They go to the bar
|
| They see if there’s any HUNKS at the bar
|
| They’re checking out the HUNKS
|
| There’s no good hunks at the bar
|
| There’s a couple of NERDS at the bar
|
| And somebody who is gonna be a nurse later
|
| Doesn’t want to get pooched by a NERD
|
| She wants a HUNK
|
| So when there’s no hunks at the bar
|
| Her and her ugly girlfriend go to the TOILET together!
|
| While they’re in there
|
| They fix their hair
|
| They check their nails
|
| They look around
|
| They smell their breath
|
| By holding their hand underneath like this and blowing up their nose
|
| The ugly girlfriend takes out her eyebrow pencil and writes “FUCK ME, YOU UGLY SON OF A BITCH!” ▶
|
| On the wall
|
| Her girlfriend who’s gonna be a nurse
|
| Tells her: “That’s not really very nice to do
|
| But let’s go out and see if there’s any more hunks”
|
| Then they go out of the toilet
|
| They go back into the disco
|
| They go out and they look around the floor
|
| See if there’s any GUYS who can DANCE
|
| Well, there’s always one
|
| He’s a cute guy
|
| He has no… He has no abilities in any field other
|
| than shaking his booty on the dance floor ▶
|
| But he doesn’t need to
|
| Because his father owns a DEPARTMENT STORE
|
| And he’ll never have to go to work a day in his life
|
| So he was born cute and he’s dancing
|
| And he’s out there kind of waiting for somebody
|
| Who’s gonna grow up to be a nurse
|
| With an UGLY girlfriend
|
| Maybe…
|
| Anyway, YOU, remember, YOU, when you went in there and YOU, YOU saw the nurse before they went into the toilet. But the nurse and the ugly girlfriend came out and they saw this dancing hunk on the floor. Hey, this is gonna be some competition for you. You don’t wanna see a nice clean nurse going off with a dancing hunk, do you?
|
| No. Not you! You won’t stand for it. You’re part Italian, right? ▶ You’re not? What, you’re Jewish? Love your nails…
|
| Anyway… ‘cause if you were part Italian you’d get some of your friends and stab him when he left the club, wouldn’t you?
|
| But you’re not gonna wait till he leaves the club. Nope. You’re gonna get him where it hurts, you don’t care whether he’s a cute guy dancing. You can’t dance, but you’re gonna pooch the nurse, aren’t you? So you go over to the girl and you say these words: “I respect you for your mind!” ▶
|
| Then the nurse looks at you and goes: “Jay-zus-Christ! Jay-zus-fuckin’-Christ! What’s wrong with you?” Then she turns to her ugly girlfriend and says: “Let’s go get the hunk!”
|
| Then you get suicidal. You go to your friend, who’s at the other table, and you ask him if he’s got any downers. And he DOES! He gives you a fistful of them. You want to kill yourself right there in the disco, don’t you? So you eat all of the downers, right there.
|
✄ Down and down they go
|
Round and round they go
|
You’re going into a spin
|
You’re loving the spin you’re in
|
| The next thing you know, you’re up and you’re dancing your ass off, aren’t you? That’s right!
|
| Suddenly, the nurse and her ugly girlfriend have NEW RESPECT FOR YOU. ‘Cause you’re a potential dancing hunk.
|
| So, but you’re so wasted you don’t even know what’s going on. All this time you thought you were going to the toilet. But you can’t find it anymore, you’re just wandering around the middle of the dance floor. And the beat goes on and you’re so wrong ▶, it’s pumping away and your buttocks are pumping up and down ▶, you’re really doing the twist and everything.
|
|
|
| Well, the next thing you know you’re over at the nurse’s apartment. Her and her ugly girlfriend have all this S&M APPARATUS.
|
| Because they discussed it, before they took you there, they said: “Hey, anybody who can dance LIKE THAT has gotta be FAN-TASTIC”. So you’ve been abducted and you’re over there in a nurse’s apartment, except now she’s wearing black leather underpants, a garter belt, a pointed titanium brassiere ▶, and she’s got a riding crop in one hand, with a black Halloween mask.
|
| And she’s putting on Black Sabbath albums in the background
|
| That’s right. But you’re so wasted, what do you know? You think you’re having a good time.
|
| And then…
|
| She makes you get down on your knees
|
| You’re kissing her boots
|
| She’s beating you across the forehead
|
| With the riding crop
|
| You don’t know
|
| You’re so wasted
|
| Her ugly girlfriend
|
| Is tying your hands behind your back
|
| With some barbed wire
|
| You like it a lot
|
| They roll you over
|
| They take a hot poker
|
| You still think you’re having a good time…
|
|
|
| You see what can happen when you go to a disco?
|
| You see what can happen when you leave a disco?
|
| Well, but not to change the subject, ladies and gentlemen, we have this song that we might as well do for you now just to end this thing off. Uh… It’s based on what the uh… the girl wrote on the wall in the toilet. The name of this song is “Stick it out”.
|
| One, two, one, two, three
|
|
|
| Fick mich, du miserabler Hurensohn
|
| Fick mich, du miserabler Hurensohn
|
|
|
| Streck aus deinen heißen gelockten…
|
| Streck aus deinen heißen gelockten…
|
| Streck aus deinen heißen gelockten Schwanz
|
| Ah-ee-ahee-ahhhh!
|
|
|
| Mach es sehr schnell
|
| Rein und raus
|
| Magisches Schwein
|
| Mach es sehr schnell
|
| Rein und raus
|
| Magisches Schwein
|
|
|
| Bis es spritzt, spritzt, spritzt, spritzt
|
| Feuer!
|
| Bis es spritzt, spritzt, spritzt, spritzt
|
| Feuer!
|
|
|
| Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa!
|
| Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa!
|
| Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa!
|
| Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa!
|
|
|
| [FZ] And now one more time in English. And if you know the words, sing along.
|
|
|
| Fuck me, you ugly son of a bitch
|
| You ugly son of a bitch
|
| Fuck me, you ugly son of a bitch
|
| Stick out yer hot curly weenie
|
| Stick out yer hot curly weenie
|
| Stick out yer hot curly weenie, weenie
|
| Weenie, weenie, weenie!
|
|
|
| Make it go fast
|
| In and out
|
| Magical pig!
|
| Make it go fast
|
| In and out
|
| Magical pig!
|
|
|
| Till it squirts (squirts), squirts (squirts), squirts (squirts), squirts (squirts)
|
| Fire!
|
| Till it squirts (squirts), squirts (squirts), squirts (squirts), squirts (squirts)
|
| Fire!
|
|
|
| Don’t get no jizz upon that sofa, sofa
|
| Don’t get no jizz upon that sofa, sofa
|
| Don’t get no jizz upon that sofa, sofa
|
| Don’t get no jizz upon that sofa, sofa
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [FZ] Ike, Tommy, Steve, Vinnie, Arthur, Bob, Ray, you and the nurse and her ugly girlfriend.
|
| Thanks for coming to the show. Good night.
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| [FZ] Thank you!
|
| [FZ] OK, OK, sit down. Just relax. One, two, one, two, three, four.
|
|
|
| Special delivery…
|
| OH NO!
|
| It’s a registered mail, buddy
|
| You’re gonna hafta sign fer this
|
| OH NO!
|
| Come on out, I know you’re in there
|
| OH NO!
|
| You goddamn communist!
|
|
|
| I don’t wanna get drafted, I don’t wanna go
|
| I don’t wanna get drafted
|
|
|
| I don’t wanna get drafted, I don’t wanna go
|
| I don’t wanna get drafted
|
| NO-OH-WOH-OH-WOH
|
|
|
| Roller skates an’ disco, is a lot of fun
|
| I’m too young an’ stupid to operate a gun
|
|
|
| I DON’T WANNA GET DRAFTED
|
| No!
|
| I DON’T WANNA GET DRAFTED
|
| Heh he-heh he-heh
|
| I DON’T WANNA GET DRAFTED
|
| Don’t touch me, get away now
|
| I DON’T WANNA GET DRAFTED
|
|
|
| My-y-y sister don’t wanna get drafted, she don’t wanna go
|
| My sister don’t wanna get drafted
|
|
|
| My-y-y sister don’t wanna get drafted, she don’t wanna go
|
| My sister don’t wanna get drafted
|
| WOH-OH-WOH-OH-WOH
|
|
|
| Wars are really ugly, they’re dirty and they’re cold
|
| I don’t want nobody to shoot her in the fox hole, fox hole
|
|
|
| [Instrumental]
|
|
|
| I don’t wanna get drafted
|
| No way!
|
| I don’t wanna get drafted
|
| Uh-huh
|
| I don’t wanna get drafted
|
| No
|
| I don’t wanna get drafted
|
|
|
| Wars are really ugly, they’re dirty and they’re cold
|
| I don’t want nobody to shoot her in the fox hole, fox hole
|
|
|
| Aiieeeeeeeee… shot in the fox hole
|
| Aiieeeeeeeee… shot in the fox hole
|
| Aiieeeeeeeee… shot in the fox hole
|
| Aiieeeeeeeee… shot in the fox hole
|
| [FZ] Hey there, people, I’m Bobby Brown
|
| They say I’m the cutest boy in town
|
| My car is fast, my teeth is shiney
|
| I tell all the girls they can kiss my heinie
|
|
|
| Here I am at a famous school
|
| I’m dressin’ sharp an’ I’m actin’ cool
|
| I got a cheerleader here wants to help with my paper
|
| Let her do all the work an’ maybe later I’ll rape her
|
|
|
| Oh God, I am the American dream
|
| I do not think I’m too extreme
|
| An’ I’m a handsome son of a bitch
|
| Gonna get a good job an’ be real rich
|
| Get a good, get a good, get a good, get a good job
|
|
|
| Women’s Liberation
|
| Came creepin’ all across the nation
|
| I tell you, people, I was not ready
|
| When I fucked this dyke by the name of Freddie
|
|
|
| She made a little speech then
|
| Aw, she tried to make me say “when”
|
| She had my balls in a vise, but she left the dick
|
| I guess it’s still hooked on, but now it shoots too quick
|
|
|
| Oh God, I am the American dream
|
| But now I smell like Vaseline
|
| An’ I’m a miserable son of a bitch
|
| Am I a boy or a lady? I don’t know which
|
| I wonder wonder, wonder wonder
|
|
|
| So I went out an’ bought me a leisure suit
|
| I jingle my change, but I’m still kinda cute
|
| Got a job doin’ radio promo
|
| An’ none of the jocks can even tell I’m a homo
|
|
|
| Eventually me an’ a friend
|
| Sorta drifted along into S&M
|
| I can take about an hour on the Tower of Power
|
| ‘Long as I gets a little golden shower
|
|
|
| Oh God, I am the American dream
|
| With a spindle up my butt till it makes me scream
|
| An’ I’ll do anything to get ahead
|
| I lay awake nights sayin’: “Thank you, Fred!”
|
|
|
| Oh God, oh God, I’m so fantastic
|
| Thanks to Freddie, I’m a sexual spastic
|
| And my name is Bobby Brown
|
| Watch me now; I’m goin’ down
|
| And my name is Bobby Brown
|
| Watch me now; I’m goin’ down
|
| And my name is Bobby Brown
|
|
|
| Watch me now, because the name of this song is “Ms. Pinky”
|
| [FZ] I got a girl with a little rubber head
|
| I rinse her out every night just before I go to bed
|
| She never talk back like a lady might do
|
| An’ she looks like she loves it every time I get through
|
|
|
| And her name is P-I-N-K-Y
|
| P-I-N, I cry
|
| K-Y, don’t be shy
|
| $69.95, boy
|
| Give her a try
|
|
|
| Her eyes is all shut in an ecstasy face
|
| You can cram it down her throat, people, any old place
|
| Throw the little switch on her battery pack
|
| You can poot it, you can shoot it till your wife gets back
|
|
|
| And her name is P-I-N-K-Y
|
| P-I-N, I cry
|
| K-Y, don’t be shy
|
| $69.95, boy
|
| Give her a try
|
|
|
| I got a girl with a little rubber head
|
| Rinse her out every night just before I go to bed
|
| She never talk back like a lady might do
|
| An’ she looks like she loves it every time I get through
|
|
|
| And her name is P-I-N-K-Y
|
| P-I-N, I cry
|
| K-Y, don’t be shy
|
| $69.95, boy
|
| Give her a try
|
| $69.95, boy
|
| Give her a try
|
| $69.95, boy
|
| Give her a try
|
| $69.95, boy
|
| Give her a try
|
|
|
| Give Ike a try
|
| Give Tommy a try
|
| And a set of chord changes
|
| Give Steve a try
|
| And a bottle of Easter egg color
|
| Give Vinnie a try
|
| And a couple of Pepto-Bismol suppositories
|
| Give Arthur a try
|
| And an Anton Webern cassette for his birthday
|
| Give Bob a try
|
| AND A CARROT
|
| Give Ray a try
|
| But keep that horrible wine in the dressing room away from him
|
| It might hurt him
|
| He could mutate insanely… ▶
|
| Oh, ✄ Atlantis! ▶
|
|
|
| Thanks for coming to the show!
|
| Good night, Buffalo
|
 Photo by Kaushal Parekh at Yellowstone National Park (1976).jpg "(Front) Photo by Kaushal Parekh at Yellowstone National Park (1976)")
.jpg "(CD inlay)")
Cover info |
Songs list
| 
Title origin
|